11-17-13

My apologies for not writing for a while.

A lot has been happening. I am learning so much about how to healthily do life, relationships, love myself and truly enjoy life and be happy. I'm learning how to stand up for my heart in a lot of ways, because I've realized that it's a huge gift God's given me to steward, and steward well. At the end of the day, if I didn't love myself well, I truly didn't love people well. It's amazing how much flows so easily through loving yourself, who God's given you the incredibly valuable opportunity of highest call He purchased at highest price. I had about a week of encounters and God taking me through searching my heart and revealing so much, and bringing so much revelation in that area. My life has completely changed through perspective He has truly divinely given me.
    I had the raw realization that before coming here, God was how I survived life. How I got through it. It's 100% true, He is the only reason I am alive and the person I am today. But now off on my own, free and given the power of choice, learning how to be happy and enjoy thoroughly every single day. That's what was bought for me, and I'm responsible for embracing that and believing it. So much of this is through knowing your needs and getting them met, and also realizing and being more aware of what you do and why, identifying the root, and asking God to fulfill, or guide to realization of what I need. I've found it so important to stop and ask myself, what do I need today, to be happy, to thrive and not just survive. Life and life to the fullest is what we've been given access to.
    As believers and followers, we NEED to love ourselves, to take care of ourselves. We can only love others, we can only love God as much as we are able to love ourselves. This idea use to really offend me quite honestly. It made me so annoyed and feel so pitiful. But to love God is to love the reflection of His image He has given you personally to take care of, to look past the sin, the dirt, the imperfections. To dare to look at the gold, and speak over and revive the unalive, abused, the scared, the meekness, the poor in that being. To reach down and cast down on yourself the unconditional love living inside of you into that being, calling forth the powerful, victorious, heir and child of the Most High that they (you) have been CHOSEN, hand-picked as. They're true self. Seeing that person, and empowering them because of His love for them, and what He did for them. He teaches us how to love through what He has created. Creation points to the Creator.

   "Take every thought captive."
We have the mind of Christ, that means we also have the power backing our thoughts that Christ did. Dang. Not just our actions, our words that create worlds (we have the power to speak things into being it's true), but our thoughts. Wow. Are our thoughts discouraging us, bringing us down, being incredibly critical? You have the authority of Christ over your thoughts to allow or cast out negative things. And I honestly believe, I can't afford to have thoughts about myself that God doesn't have.

    Things are going very well. I seem to somehow always have just enough for food and a bit of gas at the end of the week. Hoping to get a job though before the Christmas season! Believing for more.
I have really connected with two amazing friends, Sophie Cook and Taylor Adams. They are an answered cry. It is harder than you think to find real people that you click with and are on the same page as you, wherever you are, and every friendship that has been just what I needed as this, has come through my Perfect Father and not by my own will in crazy ways haha. Gotta love it. So thankful for them and our friendship.

    
    Other than hanging out with these rays of sunshine and laughter, in my free time I really enjoy going on walks and if I'm able to treat myself, a place called Coffee Bar. I enjoy going and spending hours journaling, writing, drawing reading, listening to music and doing homework there. And you're almost always guarunteed to bump into a familiar face. 

      Next weekend my friend Naya, Emily, Sophie and I are taking a mini road trip to the Bay Area (THANK YOU LORD) for Naya's Birthday! So excited. Love these girls. They walk in so much love, wisdom and one with the Spirit. And they're freaking hilarious and we pretty much pee our pants together which is always a good time. Love loving life.
    I got here because of Love truly. I am who I am because of Love truly. I cannot even fathom my life and how blessed I am so much of the time. I am blown away. I would literally have none of this, be where I am, have met all the people I have the past few years and now without Love. I wouldn't know all this true love. I am humbled.

    Lastly, as some of you know, I have the awesome opportunity of going with a team to Tijuana this spring for a missions trip! I am excited take part in bringing the radical transforming love of God to His children and watch Him pour out on TJ. My first deadline is coming up THIS TUESDAY the 19th, and I need to have $100 in at least to secure my spot on the team. If you feel like partnering with me and sowing into what God is doing in Mexico, it would be an incredible blessing! If you are interested, please follow the link. Thank you! https://missiontrips.ibethel.org/transactions/new/3764