Sharing today

I constantly ask "How am I to live my life" 

Addressing this, He transitions my process so sweetly and shows me a picture once again, of how He sees me, and how deeply. I am laying in a grass field with yellow daisies resting on the outline of my body. My arms in the position of full comfort, pleasure, embrace. My heart makes an exchange with the reality of this picture. Speaking to my soul, He shows how He sees the deep things I feel and see as I sit and ponder, as I often do, and meets me in the degree I see myself. I start to weep.

Then He addresses all my hours of untamed questions with this saturated enamored passion-filled embrace, reassuring me with all care and willing desire to, 

The fundamental absolutely unavoidable aspect of all that I've chosen to live my life by - to love, and live in community purity and power -  the whole point that they reveal and revolve around - "Being with me." He replied. He speaks not with words but from His spirit to mine, "It was all so we could be together and enjoy one another. And we've unlocked living that now. That is now. All of those other things that are "supposed to happen" are just a result of being with Me. "

When I start to put more weight on acting correctly than being with Him and enjoying Him, I fall into religion.

I must stay close.

I have come back to this question far too often, when I feel I'm not enough, or start telling myself "you should be doing this", or giving myself any unkind form of "you're not enough"
He tells me to pour compassion upon myself. To be so kind. In love He urges so deeply to be kind. And treat myself as He would the girl I am trying to encourage into the fullness I see for her, but that's not how He does it, He does it by lavishing His love, His enjoyment, favor, fun, light, grace, beauty, joy, identity, freedom on me. I should only do the same. That is how you spur one to reach their full potential, not shame or judgement. I do not see in full, and I need His eyes, I need His reality to overtake mine.

Allie, I apologize to you today, and repent for not loving to full who He has crowned redeemed and made in unique His likeness and pleasure, and given to me one of the greatest blessings of stewarding, a revelation, child and destined daughter of God.

Closing reminders to self:

-My loyalty to love myself is demonstrated when I fail.
-Nothing is worth punishing myself.
-I have committed to pursuing how He responds to me, and learn from Love how to treat myself.
-Math: "I am > (problem I am facing)"
 I will not choose to give life, authority or power to ________.
-It's incredibly hard to be hopeless in His presence.
-Honoring who the King is through how to you respond to the external world.

Reminders of self:
-I am a walking revelation of who He is.
-He is always available to me. 
-How does a child enter the throne room?
-No one can take what you have together away.

18 I am the living one. I died, but look—I am alive forever and ever! And I hold the keys of death and the grave.[a]    - Revelation 1:18