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| Alabaster house |
February 9, 2014
Looks like it's going to be around 1 post a month now.
The rain is finally back, and the mountains are beautifully seated among fog like familiar friends. It's my favorite part of the drive to school, and for the 1 exit I'm on the freeway, i'm absolutely breathless.
Learning and taking on new levels of walking out royalty, with a wealth mindset and breaking religious strongholds that have strangled my mind for years. You'll find declarations in my journal like:
- God's plans/purposes/destiny for me will overtake me, ("it'll just hit me like a tsunami." as prophesied.)
- There is nothing I can do to mess them up.
- I experience and receive the Father's love today.
- I am abundant life.
- It's God's job to take care of me.
- I sit enthroned in Heavenly places.
- God is going to redeem every part of my brother's life.
I want to talk a little about mindsets.
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| Apartment brunches |
We often look and focus on what we don't see God doing. And we discredit what He has, even earlier in the day. Our minds look to fulfill the beliefs that we have. If it is "I'm unlovable" we live in fear of rejection and memoir of what and how people said things that didn't make us feel accepted. If it's "I am enough" we'll recognize all of the daily affirmations, and receive even just the "hello" wave from across the room from a friend. And these will all build up the mindset. To break unhealthy ones, we often need to be very intentional about this. Writing down 50 things today where you were loved. Not agreeing or partnering with lies - keeping every thought captive. They're only given power with our agreement.
I've found it is important to keep testimonies of what God has done written down to go back to. In re-visiting and releasing testimonies it releases them to happen again. This is something you'll see done in Bethel culture often.
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| My designated big brother Nate |
I also want to confront another religious mindset. In my experience here at Bethel, there has been some practices (i.e. impartations) and ideas that I was not comfortable with right off the bat mostly because I was very unfamiliar with, and had people warning me about stuff and it made it very hard for me to submit to my leaders and trust where God had me and what I was taking in. The end of the day, take what people say, but trust yourself and what you hear from God. Discern for yourself. Think for yourself, but allow confrontation and always be teachable. But with all of these things, I have learned you must not judge what you do not understand. There is not one set way God moves and if He moves in a way that is uncomfortable to you, you may want to make your box bigger, or take God out of one completely. He is unlimited, and if we yield to who He is and set no limitation He will use that. He will use the sacrifice we give Him.
TJ
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| TJ in a skirt. |
Gearing up rapidly for the upcoming Tijuana trip March 25-April 5th. I am on one of the worship teams for this trip and excited to step up and go to another level with this opportunity. This was one of the practical steps I've been taking in facing my fear of singing in front of people as myself rawly with the voice God has given me. I've been in choirs before and done musicals for years, but never singing as myself. I realized what I picked up from choir is being incredibly self-aware while singing about every note and sound and the way each word is shaped. Whereas, that is not what worship is about at all hahahaha. This is me stepping into fulfilling a heart need of being heard. And we experience so much freedom through self-expression and vulnerability in it.
I miss my friends back at home a lot lately. So much love and prayers from afar!
Other fun random news:
- I am starting an Etsy account for my paintings! Yay!
Also, I asked God for an easel about a year ago, and forgot about it. Then asked Him for one for graduation, and then again at Christmas, and this week after starting my painting business my neighbor just gave me her unused one right when I've needed it most. Yay! Feelin' the loooove.
-I was nominated for BSSM Bachelorette. "Let's just have a laugh at that."
-I am moving on from my Evangelism Track and starting the "Destiny Finder" AMT. (Advanced Ministry Training).
I could use prayer for the following:
-Clarity and direction concerning things next year.
-Finances
I decided to keep this blog very honest and raw with a selection of things I've learned and been learning and going through this year. I hope you can take from my experience and all glory be given to Him.
